I, unlike many of you, don't have time to watch television. Instead, I spend most of my time thinking about an epidemic that is sweeping the nation. An epidemic so profound it is changing the world as we know it.
I’m talking about Goat Profiling.
Do you have any idea how many men and women have lost jobs just because their employer discovered they were raising goats? Me neither, but it’s bound to be huge. And what business is it to them anyway? Does raising a goat in the back yard solely for the purpose of getting rid of a few shrubs indicate what kind of worker a person might be? Absolutely not.
Of course everybody knows it's not illegal in most states for an employer to ask "the goat question" just as long as all job applicants are asked, but I'm sure if I were to take a survey, it would show that people who have a few goats in the back yard are half as likely to get a job than non goat owners.
And that’s what really gets my goat.
Do you believe you have encountered discrimination at work because you have goats? If so, call the "I Have A Goat But No Job" Hotline, and voice your concerns.
(Sorry, but I'm not exactly sure of the phone number owing to the fact that my goats ate my phone book.)